Eggslut

January 7, 2011

I love Fridays.  And weekends.  There are many reasons to, just one of which is breakfast.

Hi, my name is Jocson, and I’m an Eggslut.

Sexy sunny side up egg over a ham and jarlsburg open faced sandwhich of glory

During the weeks, I typically don’t have time to eat breakfast.  Well, I guess I could have time, but then I’d have to get up earlier.  But then I wouldn’t have sleep.  In that case, this post would be about being a sleep slut not having enough sleep.  And ‘sleep slut’ just doesn’t sound right to me…

I’m a straight up sucker for breakfast food.  I’ll eat it anytime, anywhere.  Hot or cold, if it’s in the breakfast category it’s on.  Especially. If. It’s. Eggs.  There’s nothing like waking up nice and rested on a Saturday morning at 2:00 PM… sauntering into the kitchen… and cobbling together a nice light meal…

And then dropping a motherfucking fried egg on it.

ham and gruyère, floating on a toasted roasted garlic french cloud, topped with shredded parmigiano-reggiano, crowned by a homemade parmesan cracker, and TWO FRIED EGGS OF SWEET MERCIFUL JUSTICE

Pardon the expletive, but I just couldn’t find an epic enough adjective worthy of preceding ‘fried egg.’  I suppose I shouldn’t limit this discussion to breakfast.  It’s really about the eggs.  And they go on everything.  Sprinkle some scramble on your toast, insert a fried egg in your burger, try soft eggs on pizza, crack one into your ramen as you just take it off boil, throw one in your ice cream before you drop in the hot fudge and whipped cream…

pastrami, aged provolone, slaw, tomato, and an everyday casual runny egg

OK, maybe that last one was a little too far.  But don’t rule out dessert entirely.  Ever marry an egg custard flan and a cheesecake?  Throw the batter for both together next time before cooking in a hot water bath next time, and you will meet one an ever-so-delicious love child.

I realize that by now I sound like a disgusting fatty, so I think it best to just end abruptly with a classy sammie…

capicola warmed in butter, slaw, provolone, and a respectable dignified over easy egg

…and some random light graffiti to offset the eggsesive (HA!) egg talk.

Please pass the Lipitor.

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4 Responses to “Eggslut”

  1. Jesse Sanchez said

    I am also an eggslut! If there’s a menu item w/ the option of a fried egg on it, I am more likely to make that option my meal.
    Oh, and I prefer: fried over easy (especially duck egg) or soft poached. On occasion I like: scrambled (wet), in omlet form, boiled, fertilized and then boiled (hot vit lum a.k.a. balut – duck is preferred here).
    I never like them: with ketchup, or burnt.

  2. Steph Yu said

    Cafe Mario on Friday: Breakfast – Two eggs any Style at the Eggcellent Station.

    Cafe Mario has an Eggcellent Station! Now you must really miss being out here.

  3. […] been known to fry up an egg and throw it between the layers of deliciousness in a standard Whopper-(with cheese)-to-go, split […]

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